Oh, dating. What a ride, right? You’re basically scrolling through a parade of strangers, squinting at some dude’s old beach pic from 2016, and trying to look chill while you secretly size up their quirks over dinner.
Step one? The apps. You know the drill - swipe left for gym bros, swipe right for anyone holding a dog, and if they can spell “you’re” correctly, you might as well start picking out wedding colors. People say it’s about chemistry, but honestly? It’s about finding someone whose texts don’t make you want to yeet your phone out the window.
First dates?
Oh boy. You spend way too long picking that “I woke up like this” outfit, then sit there smiling through two hours of someone’s TED Talk on crypto. If they hit you with the classic, “I’m not like other people,” just smile and nod. We’ve all heard it.
And then comes group chat time. You and your friends break down every text, every emoji, like you’re decoding hieroglyphics. “He added two exclamation points - is that excitement or danger?” “She ordered a salad, should I be worried?”
Let’s not forget ghosting—the ultimate 21st-century plot twist. One minute you’re trading memes, next minute, poof. Did aliens abduct them? Did their phone explode? Who knows.
Honestly, dating is thrift shopping for people. You sort through a bunch of oddballs, maybe find something that fits, and sometimes it’s got a bit of a weird vibe - but hey, that’s all part of the adventure.
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